Killer Assistant (2016 Lifetime)

Killer Assistant (2016 Lifetime)

Cast: Arianne Zucker, Brando Eaton, Natalie Lander

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Synopsis (via Lifetime)

Just as a high profile editor finds her husband cheating, her hot new assistant shows an interest in her. His carefully planned seduction leads to an affair, and her world becomes a nightmare of deceit, obsession… and murder.

Thoughts

The movie begins with a little boy catching his babysitter making out with her boyfriend. The little boy asks Susie to promise never to leave him. She agrees and gives him a ring.

Flash to the present day, Susie (Now Suzanne.) is all grown up and having some sexy time with her musician husband, Robert. They have a teenage daughter of her own named Calista. (She is moody and dates a stoner boy named Douglas. Think low budget, Lacey Chabert.)

Suzanne works as managing editor at the last well-performing magazine. Her boy Janet hires a personal assistant named David for Suzanne to work with. David is dead sexy. The other gay co-workers think so too. They look him up on social media, but can’t find him. When a female co-worker, Mary, gets too curious, her Achilles is slashed in the parking lot.

With her new free time, Suzanne spends time with her family. The trouble is, they don’t want her around really. Calista freaks out on her mother when she bans Douglas from the house. Robert is too busy playing music in dive bars. They scream at each other all the time.

David is ambitious and has read all of Suzzane’s articles. He offers to walk his boss to her car for safety after the attack on Mary. Then he tells her that he is at her disposal. He books her meetings, lunches, and even lands an exclusive interview with an Ex-Childstar named Nora. (Think Lindsey Lohan vibe.) David is doing so well that Suzanne takes him out for an after-work drink.

At the bar, Suzanne tells David that she caught her husband making out while interviewing the celebrity. David can’t understand why anyone would cheat on someone so beautiful and intelligent as her. Suzanne laughs off his flirting, and they drink more whiskey. Eventually, doing shots and dancing. Then they kiss and stumble out of the bar to have sexy time. (Like Woah, it is a very long sex scene.)

The next morning, Suzanne wakes up and tells David that it was a mistake. Then she goes home and screams at Robert for cheating on her. He says that he didn’t kiss the woman; she kissed him. Robert begs Suzanne not to leave him and suggests therapy.

When Suzzane gets to work, she tells David he will be removed as her assistant and assigned to someone else. He isn’t going to let that happen and blackmails her with questionable videos he took at the bar and a sex tape. She tells him that she will end him and gets very angry. This woman has some anger management issues.

David creates a situation where he meets and charms Calista. One of the cooks at the restaurant calls David “Kurt.” He laughs it off as a mistaken identity. David helps Calista land an internship and keeps telling her that she reminds him of Suzanne.

Mary is back and questions David about his past. He brushes off her questions and tells her that he hopes nothing bad happens to her. Of course, bad things do happen to Mary. She is murdered just as she learns that David is using a fake name.

Norah, the child star, goes on a bender and does an interview. Suzanne was supposed to approve the video before it was sent out, but she was in couples therapy. David sent the video with Suzanne’s “approval,” Leaving Suzanne to take the fall for the PR nightmare. Suzanne tries to explain to Janet that David is setting her up. Janet is not hearing it and insists that Suzanne stop making excuses and blaming her assistant for her mistakes.

A detective arrives at the office and informs everyone of Mary’s death. He questions the staff, and David suggests that Mary had an online stalker. Then gets into a fender bender with Suzanne, just because!

When Calista sneaks out with David, Suzanne comes clean and tells Robert that she slept with her assistant, who is also stalking her family. Robert is angry and goes for a run, leaving Suzanne to drinks wine and look into David online. Robert sees David on his run and punches him in the face. David grabs a tire iron and violently beats Robert dead!!!!

The detective is back, and Suzanne tells him she knows David did it. She comes clean about the affair to give the detective motive. The detective re-questions the staff. When he talks to David, David confirms that they had a one night stand, and paints Suzanne as desperate and vengeful.

Suzanne and David have a training montage. Suzanne punches a punching bag, while David does pull up in his underwear. (Gratuitous, but appreciated.) Calista interrupts the workout, and while David is showering, she finds the videos on his phone. She attempts to call her mother, but David catches her and knocks her out.

Armed with a bat, Suzanne shows up to save her daughter. David shows Suzanne the ring that she gave him when she was his baby sitter. His real name is Curtis. When she stopped babysitting him, he was put into foster care. He only wants to be with her because she is the only one who loved him. Suzanne looks at him for a moment and then knocks him in the head with the bat. (Haha!) Calista is free, and she takes a turn with the bat. The women escape. Then they look out at the ocean.

Side Note

Minority Report: Charles, Therapist

Two women writers (Sophie Tilson, Shanrah Wakefield) wrote the movie. I liked their fun, dialogue, and diverse characters.

The movie features one of my fav LGBTQ actors, Darryl Stephens. (He should do more Lifetime.)

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Overall rating

🔪🔪🔪🔪 (4 Knives)

🍷🍷🍷 (3 glasses of wine required.)