Their Killer Affair (2017 Lifetime)
Stars: Melissa Archer, Brandon Beemer, Marlon Aquino |
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Synopsis (via Lifetime)
Detective Maxine “Max” Peyton has been enlisted to investigate the murder of a member of Adeline Lilly–a website dedicated to matching married adults together who are looking to cheat on their spouse. Perplexed by a charm left on the corpse, Max wonders if there is more to this case than a simple murder. It’s not until more dead bodies show up with similar charms that she is certain that Adeline Lilly users are being targeted and murdered based on their sexual fetishes. When the “hack-tivist” group Incognito releases the names of all Adeline Lilly users, Max has to act fast to figure out who is behind these murders before more bodies pile up.
Thoughts
A man in scrubs pulls up to an RV and looks around. He is meeting a girl for a hookup, but it is super sketchy, and he should know better. The man gets attacked, tied up, and strangled. Hey, at least it wasn’t a blonde woman this time!
Detectives, Maxine, and Nick, are deliciously attractive. They work late together, but Maxine has to go to a store opening that her friend Jen is throwing. The music is so loud at the party that I miss the exposition in this scene. I think Maxine is reluctantly dating a dork named Simon. The party is interrupted when Maxine gets a scary video of the doctor killing.
At the scene of the crime, the sound mixing isn’t much better. Nick shows Maxine the RV, and they walk around with flashlights. They find the doctor naked and hanging from a noose with some jewelry around his neck. Honestly couldn’t tell you what the hell they are saying because the sound mixing is so bad or the actors are mumbling.
When the detectives are the leads in a Lifetime movie, that is never a good sign. If I wanted to watch a Law and Order episode without the “dun, dun’s,” I’d watch NYPD blue.
Detectives interview his wife and BFF, who both seem like snobs.
Another hunky man is killed while tied up and naked. He is whipped to death, which is another racially insensitive way to die. Whipping and hanged by a noose? The movie calls them fetishes. I’d call them problematic. It did not seem like an underground BDSM ring the way it is depicted in the film.
The detectives think they have a serial killer on their hands. They make a profile on the Killer and call him incognito. Or maybe incognito is a website, and they are naming him after that? I’m so bored with this movie.
Maxine and Jen meet up to talk about relationships. (This movie fails the Bechdel test so hard.) Jen and Greg’s relationship are on the rocks. Maxine is with Simon but has a cop ex-boyfriend who wants to get back with her. IDK, the sound mixing here is terrible as well, and most of the conversation is lost of background chatter. After the lunch date, Maxine is almost killed in her car but somehow breaks free. (Which never happens in a Lifetime movie. If someone is in your backseat, you are dead.)
The detectives learn that a dummy account lures the victims. The account has one picture and is posing as someone named Lola. (A little spot on, Killer. Obviously a catfish.)
The next victim is Max’s ex-boyfriend Ryan. His heels are slashed, and we see it, gross!!! (What is this HBO? Show me minimal blood and move on, Lifetime!) Maxine is upset and talks about it in a rainy car. What does she say? I couldn’t tell you. The rain was too loud.
Simon, Jen, and Greg sit Max down with some wine and tell her to take a break from the case. It is getting too personal. While getting more wine, Jen makes a move on Max. He shuts her down.
Greg finds out Jen has been cheating on him and leaves her. He tells her that she is not a decent human being and is dead to him. Jen attacks him and has to be pulled off of him by Jen and Nick. Jen tells Max that she has been unhappy for a long time, and it was easier to pretend.
Maxine comes home and finds blood on the floor, Simon is shirtless and fixing a wound on his head. She pulls a gun on him because she is on edge. She asks him where Jen is, and he tells her that if that bitch is staying with them, just shoot him and put him out of his misery. (This is the only good part in this movie.)
A finger is sent to Maxine and Nick in at the precinct. Jen is being held hostage, and the scary mask video person sends them a video telling them where to meet him. Max goes alone and finds a car empty.
She walks around with her gun and hears people fighting in a trailer. Simon is there, and Max holds him at gunpoint. Then Simon is shot. Nick shows up next and is also shot. Mac gets hit in the face with a gun and kidnapped. She is forced in a car and told to drive. As they drive, the assailant removes his mask. It is Greg, WHO CARES.
Greg talks in the backseat, but I don’t know what he is going on about. I guess his motives. I should turn on the closed captioning, but at this point, I have had so much wine, I don’t know how to do it.
Max gets the gun from Greg eventually and kills him. Nick is taken into the hospital, and so does Simon they kiss as he is wheeled away. Who knows what happened to Jen and who cares.
Side Note
Minority Report: Captain Collins, Mohammed.
Listed as a Lifetime Movie Premiere, but filmed in 2017. Hmmm? It was maybe one of the worst primetime features I’ve ever seen on the channel.
Marvista joint. It was a letdown.
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Overall rating
🔪 (1 Knife)
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷 (5 glasses of wine required.)
*Photo Credit: © 2017 Lifetime
