Psycho Escort (2020 Lifetime)
Stars: Victoria Barabas, Nick Ballard, Kat Fairaway, Jacob Sandler
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Synopsis (via Lifetime)
After her husband’s death, Diane has been a single mother to son Jake. She’s not ready to date but also doesn’t want to attend another work event alone, so her sister, Lori, suggests a rent-a-date service where Diane can hire someone to pose as her boyfriend. Diane meets her match, Miles, who is very charming and handsome. Diane knows it’s all an act but feels a connection with Miles’ fictional persona. But it soon becomes evident that Diane has rented a pathological liar with a disturbing dark past and no intention of leaving her.
Thoughts
The movie starts with a VERY Hallmarky vibe, down to the kitschy music. Diane is a workaholic single mother who wants to make partner at her law firm. Her son Jake is acting out and let down by his mother. Diane’s sister Lori is staying with her to help out since Diane works so much to avoid thinking about the death of her husband. Lori encourages Diane to start dating again and creates an online profile for a “rent a date” website.
The next day Diane goes to the fancy dating office of The Compaininship Collective, which is efficiently run. Diane makes her choices and books an escort for her work function. She is matched with a man named Miles. Miles is handsome (in a Ryan Murphy show way.) They don’t hit it off right away, and Miles gets angry when Diane tries to take a picture of him.
At the party, Diane is hitting up the charcuterie board and connecting with her boss Garrett. Miles impresses her co-workers, well everyone except for Kyle (Diane’s work rival) and Russel (Diane’s work husband.) Diane is pleased with Miles’s charming skills and ends the date with an awkward conversation about tipping and a bottle of wine. (Haha, always tip your escorts people.)
Miles is such a hit with Diane’s co-workers that she rehires him for a partner dinner. Off the books this time because he wasn’t available through the agency. He was at her son’s baseball game. It is sketchy at best, Miles impresses again speaking mandarin during cocktails and eating a terrible looking dinner. Kyle says he recognizes Miles, who plays it off and says he has a familiar face. After the party, Diane and Miles bond over their dead spouses. Miles steals her bracelet that was a gift from her deceased husband. IDK why. At home, Miles looks into a mirror and smiles creepily.
Russel congratulates Diane on her boyfriend being a hit at the dinner. He seems a bit jealous. Diane clarifies that she is not dating Miles and “rented” him. Russel thinks that it is gross and says that next time, Diane should bring him as his date. They have a cute relationship.
While making pasta, Diane is surprised to find Miles at her door. He uses the bracelet as a bitch trick to see her again. Then the psycho escort fakes a sneeze and asks for a glass of water to stick around longer. THEN he plays catch with Jake filling in for the father figure that he lost. Diane watches from the window, but not happily, she looks creeped out.
She should be! Diane gets a call from her co-worker/enemy Kyle who realizes where he recognizes Miles from. His sister rented Miles for a wedding; only his name was Ben. When Diane tells him that Kyle is blackmailing her, Miles assures her that everything will be okay. By okay, Miles means MURDER! (He throws Kyle in his trunk, it is all off-camera and pretty lame.)
Diane gets promoted! (You go, gurl!) She starts spending more time with Miles, who admits to lying about a few things… Like his name (Peter Dwyer) and being a mentor in the Big Brother program. Diane forgives him and wants to give their relationship a real shot because… you know, his wife died! (Also, he is hot AF. I get it, Diane!) Russel doesn’t get it either and looking into Miles. When he confronts Diane, she brushes it off but seems confused. Later, she tells Miles/Peter that the timing is wrong. She isn’t ready for a relationship.
Miles/Peter gets aggressive with Diane on her front doorstep but is stopped by Lori. (Remember her? Me neither.) Lori does a google search, and they find out that the car accident that killed his wife was suspicious.
At the baseball field, Jake gets picked up by Miles/Peter. Jake is lured away with the promise of hotdogs. Diane is rightfully freaked out when she goes to pick up her son, and he isn’t there. When she rushes home, she is relieved to find Jake unharmed. Diane does some grade A parenting and fills her son in on stranger danger 101.
Diane takes some pills and goes to bed in her house alone. (He son went to a sleepover and sister had to study.) Miles/Peter breaks into the house and carries her to the master bedroom. When Diane wakes up, she is terrified but quickly pretends that she is into it. Diane fake seduces him and tells him to put on some sexy music.
With one minute left in the movie, Diane fights for her life and smashes Miles/Peter in the head with a wine bottle. Lori shows up, and they call 911, but he is gone. The police arrive, and so does Russel. He comforts Diane, and they have a budding romance. Miles/Peter watches from a tree angrily. The end?
Side Note
Minority Report: Betty, Garrett, and his unnamed wife.
Part of the Charmed and Dangerous Series.
The score here was terrible.
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Overall rating
🔪 (1 Knife)
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷 (5 glasses of wine required.)
*Photo Credit: © 2020 Lifetime
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