Staging Christmas (2019 Lifetime)

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Synopsis (via Lifetime)

Lori (Moon Frye) stages homes for a living, and her busiest season is Christmas! Though she normally only stages homes that are for sale, she’s intrigued when a wealthy widower named Everett (Stults) asks her to stage his home for the holidays to cheer up his daughter, Maddie. As Lori starts remaking Everett’s home, she finds that Maddie isn’t the only one in desperate need of the Christmas spirit. As Lori spends more and more time with Everett and Maddie, she starts to feel like part of the family. While she was initially hired to simply stage the perfect Christmas in their house, she ends up creating it for the father and daughter in every way imaginable.

Thoughts

Punky Brewster (or Lori) loves coffee and Christmas decorations; she is an interior decorator. She stages houses with Christmas decorations to help them sell. Her boss is Steve Urkel, and he wants Lori to manage the New York City branch. She is one of three and not happy about the competition. Lori volunteers to plan the Christmas party without a venue

Everett owns King Roasters Coffee and is a Christmas skeptic. He recently moved with his daughter, Maddie, into a new home. He goes to pick up some soup and bumps into Lori. He has dropped the ball on Christmas the past few years because of his wife’s death. All Maddie wants for Christmas is a puppy and Christmas decorations. He hires Lori to recreate the decor for staging. She turns him down but asks him if she can use his house to host the event.

Lori recruits Maddie to help her pick out decorations that remind her of her mother. Also enlisted to help are Everett’s sister Nickky and Lori’s BFF Tonya. Both Nickky and Tonya are surprised to see their loved ones so happy working on this project. Everett and Lori are both feeling the Christmas Spirit. (They pick out a Christmas Tree and sing Jingle Bells with an entire restaurant. It is a little much.)

This movie is super boring, and I don’t even know what to write because nothing is happening. Lori is just decorating with Maddie and bonding. (Lori’s mother died when she was young too.) Then Everett makes a coffee tasting for Lori and goes into detail about why and how he opened Kings Roasters Coffee. They sexily make lattes, and Lori spills scalding-hot milk on herself, entirely unfazed. Then they almost kiss but are interrupted by a customer.

WINTER STORM MEGAN is coming and threatens to cancel the holiday party. Everyone in town hunkers down, and the storm doesn’t hit. The party is still on. As catering is setting up, Lori and Everett avoid talking about their feelings, dragging this movie out even longer.

At the party, Steve Urkel is impressed with Lori’s work. Lori shows up to the party looking like Jessica Rabbit at Christmas. Everett plays the piano and sings “The 12 Days of Christmas” along with all the party guests. (Who knows all the words.) Lori gets the promotion, and everyone cheers. She is put on the spot and looks longingly at Everett, who looks away. She accepts the promotion and starts working on Christmas.

Twenty minutes in this movie left, and all I need to know is, WHY! Everett tells Lori that he is happy for her, but he is falling in love with her. She tells him that she can’t, and he kisses her face, wishing her the best. Everett then promotes his lesbian sister to CEO so that he can have more time with his daughter, and maybe Lori?

Maddie gets her Christmas wish and acquires a dog. She also gets her other wish for Lori to spend Christmas with them. Maddie wrote an essay about Lori, who convinced her to stay. Lori pitches to stage houses at Christmas for families during the holiday, and her boss goes for it. They kiss and then open gifts.

Side Note

I like Soleil Moon Frye, but this movie was unwatchable.

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Overall rating: Put a Cork in it

🎄(1 Christmas Tree)

🍷(1 glass of wine required)

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