The Pom Pom Murders (2020 Lifetime)

The Pom Pom Murders (2020 Lifetime)

Cast: Anna Marie Dobbins, Grace Patterson, Tonya Kay

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Synopsis (via Lifetime)

Audrey has always wanted to be a part of the L.A. Renegades pro basketball dance squad. When Audrey tries out for the upcoming season and makes the team, she also meets one of Walter’s team players. They quickly fall for each other, but when Bailey–a “Renegade Girl” and Walter’s ex-girlfriend–is found dead, the police arrest Walter. Despite the evidence incriminating Walter, Audrey can’t believe the man she loves is a murderer. As she starts asking questions, one of her fellow Renegades friends, Tracy, turns up dead under mysterious circumstances. Audrey then realizes her life is also in danger. But as Audrey delves deeper, she uncovers a twisted, lethal conspiracy she never expected. Now, Audrey must fight to expose the truth–and survive.

Thoughts

The movie begins with a cheer routine that is one of the more dancey and sexy acts we’ve seen all Cheer Rally Kill season. After the game, Audrey is attacked in her home and shot, so is her mother. Audrey gives a self-aware voice over. (Which I love.)

Flash to four months earlier to professional L.A. cheerleader tryouts. Tracy is no-nonsense and playfully shames Audrey for being late for rehearsal. Then she yells at a blonde diva named Bailey, who cuts the line. Bailey feels like she runs the squad, much to Coach Cassie’s annoyance. These actresses can REALLY dance. I am impressed.

After the final audition, Audrey gets a ride from an NBA player named Walt. They casually flirt, but Walt is waiting for marriage to have sex. Which is tragic because he is fine AF. Then Bailey is murdered in front of her dog. IN FRONT OF HER DOG!?!?!?

Tracy calls Audrey to tell her that she didn’t make the squad. Audrey puts her on hold, finds out she makes the team, and obliviously brags about it to Tracy. Audrey then does a Tom Cruise couch dance and celebrates with a picnic date with Walt. (He has such a basketball hunk vibe.) They kiss, and I am jealous.

At the first practice, Audrey is thrilled to see Tracy. Tracy made the team after Bailey goes missing. A janitor named Lou yells at the girls for spilling something and blows it way out of proportion. Norah, the team manager, smooths things over and then informs the squad about Bailey’s murder.

Walter is questioned by the police and taken into custody. Audrey’s mother is very disapproving of Walter and most of Audrey’s life choices.

Audrey makes more poor choices when she accuses Tracy of killing Bailey in the middle of practice. Tracy is having none of it and provides an alibi. Coach Cassis angrily pulls Audrey into her office and tells her she needs to apologize or she is off the squad. Then the coach shares that she understands why someone would want to kill Bailey. Ugh, then the creepy janitor watches Audrey shower and change in the locker room. Gross.

Walter is on house arrest and works out at home shirtless. Audrey talks with him and is convinces that he is innocent.

At practice, Audrey catches Norah having a mental breakdown. Norah is having marital troubles with her husband because she is convinced he is cheating on her with the cheerleaders. Bailey saw them arguing and recorded it with her cellphone. They catch her and probably kill her later.

Norah comes home from practice; she catches him with Tracy. Tracy overhears the conversation about Bailey and knows that they are responsible. Tracy tries to run for her life but ends up getting thrown down the stairs. Tracy’s body is staged outside of the gym as a suicide.

Norah’s husband, Michael, hires the janitor to kill Audrey. He almost does, but Norah saves Audrey and kills him with a wrench. The detectives are like, “Welp! We solved the case. Bye!” Stupid detectives. Walter is out of house arrest and back in the park on dates with Aubrey. Aubrey thinks the killer is still out there and suspects the squad owners.

The movie reveals that Norah killed Bailey for the video like it should have shocked us?

The cheerleaders do a sexy tribute dance for Tracy, and it is honestly too much. Norah has another nervous breakdown and screams at them that they are whores. She admits to killing Tracy and Bailey. Or at least the outburst gives the press something to run as the top news story. Michael and Norah are arrested. Oh wait, Norah isn’t for some reason, and she is the person who was shooting Audrey and her mother at the beginning of the movie. Oh, wait, wait. It was a daydream. Norah is arrested outside their home by a sexy cop.

Walter meets Audrey’s mother and tells her how amazing she is. Her mother is still disapproving, but at least she is at the game, right? The professional cheerleaders do a routine the same one we saw in the beginning. The end!

Side Note

Minority Report: Tracy, Cameraman, squad members,

Also Known as Ruthless Renegade

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Overall rating

🔪🔪🔪 (3 Knives)

🍷🍷🍷🍷 (4 glasses of wine required.)