A Very Nutty Christmas (2018 Lifetime)

A Very Nutty Christmas  

Stars: Melissa Joan Hart, Barry Watson &  Richard Riehle

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Synopsis (via Lifetime)
Kate, a workaholic baker, has given up on Christmas, especially this year, when her boyfriend dumps her and she’s got to fill an order of 12,000 cookies before Christmas. However, the gift of a magic nutcracker who turns into a real man makes the once cynical Kate understand the magic and beauty of Christmas–and of love

Thoughts

Starts with a ballet baking montage to Nutcracker Suite. Melissa Joan Hart and her co-workers (Justin and Rosa) are helping her reach her fulfill operation cookie. (An order of 15,000 cookies before Christmas. Dancing Flours bakery is always booming because kids come their after school and even santa shows up. Santa turns out to be Mark an actor who is dating Melissa Joan Hart. He breaks up with her while she is slaving away over cookies, he grabs a bunch of cookies and says:

“That’s the way the relationship crumbles.”

Melissa Joan Hart drowns her sorrow with eggnog because Santa broke up with her. Haha.

At the post office, everyone in town keeps asking Melissa Joan Hart if Mark will be coming to this or that. Melissa Joan Hart yells “MARK BROKE UP WITH ME!” The post office lady is friends with Melissa Joan Hart and takes her shopping to lift her spirits. (With the most pathetic tree I’ve ever seen in a Christmas movie.)

While shopping at the market, Melissa Joan Hart meets Dosselmeyer a old man in a bowtie. He owns an antique shop and talks about how Christmas is a magical time. He gives her a Nutcracker, which is the original Nutcracker (We know this because he comes in a wooden crate.)

Melissa Joan Hart is home alone (because her boyfriend dumped her.) and is talking to THe Nutcracker. She wishes he would help her get through the holidays and then knocks him over and breaks his arm. At the stroke of midnight some magic snow comes in the window and swirls around the Nutcracker under the tree.

Cut to the next morning, Melissa Joan Hart is getting ready and looking at her phone she is late. She at first steps over the full grown Nutcracker in her living room, but then trips over him and is like WTF!? Melissa Joan Hart takes up the Nutcracker who is all confused but is here to protect her. Melissa Joan Hart thinks he is the house share she booked to replace her boyfriends room. (Who was supposed to be an actor who will be performing in the town Nutcracker.)

Melissa Joan Hart tells Rosa that it is weird her house share until they notice that he is standing in the middle of traffic outside of their store. The Nutcracker doesn’t how the world works and goes around telling everyone about Nutcracker things. Melissa Joan Hart tells him to stop acting so weird, until she sees her ex and wants to show off her new man. She then gives him some coffee and cookies.

Rosa talks Melissa Joan Hart into hiring The Nutcracker. Which is perfect because their nut cracking machine is broken and The Nutcracker can do it with his hand very easily. Melissa Joan Hart trades his has with an apron. The Nutcracker’s name is Chip and he will work for Melissa Joan Hart until Christmas. (He is VERY concerned about the mouse king, but you can’t way mouse in a bakery.)

The post office lady gives Chip some new clothing (that are from the 80’s) but it doesn’t last long. Chip goes back to his nutcracker outfit and decorates her house for Christmas. Melissa Joan Hart discovers that a video of him cracking nuts has gone viral (He thinks that sounds bad.) and Chip is used to entertain people while the bakers bake.

Chip learns about the Christmas Ball and invites Melissa Joan Hart with a cute cake he made. Melissa Joan Hart needs something to wear! AND WE GET A DRESS TRYING ON MONTAGE!!!!! IT’S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. (She also gets a makeover! What did I do to deserve this?!)

It’s the night of the Christmas ball and Chip picks up Melissa Joan Hart in a horse drawn carriage. Chip gives Melissa Joan Hart some crazy ruby earrings and she gets him a scarf. They pull up to the ball and everyone is super impressed. (Melissa Joan Hart’s boyfriend is super insecure about his life choices.)

More Nutcracker music plays as Melissa Joan Hart and Chip enter the ball. Melissa Joan Hart is decked out if a white victorian gown with a embedded boddess. Melissa Joan Hart explains ball things to Chip. Like, you don’t have to be silent in a silent auction. He tells her about his life as a soldier.

At dinner, Marks date is trying to mack on Chip. She’s a masseuse so she massages his hands. The Nutcracker music begins to play and Chip runs to the dancefloor to dance with everyone on the floor. (Including the dudes, haha.) Melissa Joan Hart comes to dance with Chip and disses Mark, who offers.

The silent auction happens and Melissa Joan Hart wins everything. Chip bid the highest number because he doesn’t understand how money works. She also wins a a trip and when it is announced they say the title of the movie, “Looks like Kates going to have a very nutty Christmas!”

The next morning, Chip gets to work early on baking cookies and we get another baking montage! They are so productive at cookie making, Melissa Joan Hart gives everyone a day off because they are a day ahead.

Chip and Melissa Joan Hart build a snowman, carol, go shopping and go ice skating in another montage. After the montage, Melissa Joan Hart tells Chip that she is falling in love and they kiss!

Melissa Joan Hart gets a text from her House Share app and discovers that Chip isn’t her guest at al, he is just a weird man in her house. She goes to see Dosselmeyer but he has gone back to Germany. She get a ticket to go see The Nutcracker and get to the bottom of this. When she sees Chip at The Nutcracker she asks him why he isn’t on stage. They argue as she finds her seat in the play. They will talk after the show. As the ballet goes through the polt, Melissa Joan Hart pieces it together that Chip is for real The Nutcracker.

Melissa Joan Hart is back to being focused on work and not on being in love. Chip shows up to work his last day and Melissa Joan Hart sends him away. Chip just stands outside of the bakery, he is waiting for the mouse king. Co-worker Justin comes out and tells him to give her some time.

At the town bar, Mark Santa shows up and finds out Melissa Joan Hart broke up with Chip. Mark/Santa goes to win Melissa Joan Hart back. At the bar Chip is entertaining everyone. Until he sees Melissa Joan Hart being hassled by delivery drivers. Chip saves the day and the cookies get delivered. (With the towns help, of course)

Chip and Melissa Joan Hart spend Christmas Eve together. The power goes out and they sit in candlelight. They fall asleep holding hands and when she wakes up he is back to his little toy self. He leaves a note that says, “See you next Christmas.”

Melissa Joan Hart delivers all her Silent Auction items to friends and invites them to her house for Christmas dinner. While cooking the Ava (knock off Alexa), starts playing The Nutcracker. Melissa Joan Hart  runs to the door and hugs the man. It isn’t Chip it is the Post Office Lady’s Nephew and he reminds her so much of Chip. (He is from Germany, breaks nuts with his hands, dances, and lives to serve Melissa Joan Hart.) He brings a gift, a nutcracker from Germany with a note from the Dosselmeyer. “Remember Christmas is a time for magic.”

Side Note

The tone of this movie is WAY over the top, but you know a Nutcracker comes to life… so it works for this movie.

There is a fat baby in this movie and he is really cute.

Minority Report: Justin,

Overall rating

🎄🎄🎄(3 Christmas Trees)

🍷🍷🍷 (3 glasses of wine required)

*Photo Credit: © 2018 Lifetime

2 Comments

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