Deadly Yoga Retreat (2022 Lifetime)
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Cast: Jonathan Bennett, Sarah Ashley Rodriguez, Danielle C. Ryan
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Synopsis (via Lifetime)
Isabella’s marriage is falling apart, and something needs to change to keep her and her husband Patrick together. When Isabella is invited to an exclusive Hawaiian yoga retreat run by the famous yoga guru Remy Morrow, Patrick insists she go and try to find herself. Hopefully, this time apart and this time for Isabella to center herself will improve their life together. But when Isabella arrives in paradise, she soon discovers the retreat is not what it seems, and neither is Remy. Isabella must put herself to the test physically and emotionally to survive a psychopath who is stalking and killing the retreat guests. Once his sights are set on her, paradise becomes hell on earth. Jonathan Bennett and Danielle C. Ryan star. (2022)
Recap/Wine Thoughts
The movie starts on a yoga retreat, as promised, complete with scenic waterfalls. (Oh, and a murderer!) A young couple is enjoying the waterfall when a killer, (Obviously Jonathan Bennett in a baseball cap.) slashes the throat of a girl and then just walks away. (RUDE!)
Cut to Isabella and her husband, Patrick. She is missing teaching Yoga after giving it up for law school. An invitation from yoga guru Remington Morrow (AKA Jonathan Bennett) for her dream yoga retreat. She books a flight right away.
Jonathan Bennett welcomes the yogis, who all happen to be beautiful women. He tells them that he can cut any of them from the program at a moment’s notice. It happens quickly, a girl named Nina is cut from the program for falling on the mat during a morning session.
While eating a shrimp board, Jonathan Bennett meets with Nina. He hits on her, but she is married and declines his offer. He gets enraged and force-feeds Nina shrimp because she is deathly allergic. (She has a graphic allergic reaction.) Bye Nina!
Jonathan Bennett pushes the students hard in class and even causes one, Gretchen, to pass out from exhaustion. The resort manager Jeffery looks the other way and even helps Jonathan Bennett cover up his murders.
Gretchen cries because she doesn’t want to leave. She begs Jonathan Bennett to stay and says she will do anything. Including sex on the beach. After a sexy time, Jonathan Bennett still sends her home. When she threatens to expose him, he snaps her neck.
At a luau, Jonathan Bennett makes a speech and selects a few students to hike a mountain with him for a memorable yoga trip. He picks Lisa, Everly, Pam, and Isabella. The girls shamelessly flirt with Jonathan Bennett after a ton of champagne, and it feels like an episode of The Bachelor.
While trying to call her husband, Isabella sees Jonathan Bennett and Everly laughing on the beach. Then she passes out for the night and is VERY hungover the next day. Everly is nowhere to be found and misses the mountain hike.
On the hike, Jonathan Bennett shares about a troubled past. They set up camp, and Jonathan Bennett sneaks into her tent, and she shuts it down.
The hiking continues, and they make it to the murder waterfall from the beginning of the movie. Jonathan Bennett tells them that fear is the manifestation of the mind. Isabella is totally over him at this point.
At the highest altitude, they practice a pose called the ocean pearl, basically standing on one leg. Lisa, who only has one lung, struggles to control her breathing, and Isabella becomes concerned. She faints, and Jonathan Bennett stays with her while the other yogis run and get help. He strangles her and makes weird faces while doing so.
Pam freaks out on Jonathan Bennett and tells him that she is reporting him to the authorities. He stabs her in the chest and laughs. Isabella runs into the woods, and Jonathan Bennett chases her through the woods while screaming “ISABELLA,” similar to Jerry Lewis, “HEY LADY!”
Isabella finds herself on the edge of the waterfall and does the pearl of the ocean pose to center herself before jumping off before Jonathan Bennett can stab her. He jumps after her and follows her deeper into the woods.
Jonathan Bennett shares his yoga secrets with Isabella, which is that he doesn’t hold any insights. Isabella kills him and hikes back to the resort.
The police are finding bodies everywhere and putting them in body bags. Jeffery is arrested. Isabella looks out at the sunset and her husband Patrick rushes to her side. They kiss, and she tells him she found what she was looking for… him!
Side Note
Minority Report: Pam, Everly,
The tone of this movie was a little silly. Attempts at comedy just come off strange in Lifetime movies.
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*** I’ve updated the rating system moving forward. Knives represent # of kills. Wine is over enjoyment (NOT a value judgment) on a 1-5 scale.
I will use the following tags for those who want to know whether to watch or skip: Pour it Up (Would Recommend) or Put A Cork In It (Would Not Recommend).
Overall rating
Number of Kills:
🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 (6 Knives)
Enjoyment Level: 🍷🍷 (2 glasses of wine.)
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*Photo Credit: © 2022 Lifetime® | A+E Networks®
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